From partying and onboard activities to gourmet food and excursions, cruises offer such a variety of things to do that it can be hard to know where to start - especially for a first timer. But then there are those people on board who have unapologetically found their niche - and they’re sticking to it. We’ve all met a Buffet Barry hovering around the restaurants, or an Excursion Eddie keen to get to the next port - and if you haven’t, you might be them!
Read on for five cruisers you’re bound to meet on every single voyage.
Whether the Karaoke Kim you met onboard sings like an angel or a yowling cat, it doesn’t really matter - she just loves to take that mic. Bubbly Kim is fun. Some would say almost too much fun to handle. You’re left in no doubt that this particular karaoke queen is determined to make the most of the cruise’s party scene. On stage, she’s a fan of a ballad, veering between Celine, Mariah, Whitney, and Adele. And, unlike some of the less rehearsed singers, she’s not one to share the spotlight, or dissolve into giggles halfway through: Kim might be a laugh, but she takes her karaoke pretty seriously - air grabs and all.
If there’s one thing everyone knows about Buffet Barry, it’s that this bloke is absolutely living his best life. You know that familiar feeling you get when the buffet opens, and you’re starving, but you hold back because you don’t want to be the first to rush up there? If you don’t then you’re probably Buffet Barry: this gourmand has no such qualms. He has shelled out for the all-you-can-eat option, and if he doesn’t truly eat all he can physically eat then his name is not Barry.
You’ll commonly find him at the buffet, piling his plate to the heavens with appetisers, mains, and indulgent desserts, and then going back for second, third, and fourth rounds. Buffet Barry’s hunger cannot be sated - and, secretly, we’re all a little jealous of his carefree attitude to cuisine.
It’s a week into the cruise and Pam has not moved from her poolside lounger yet. ‘When does this woman eat?’, ‘When does she sleep?’, ‘Is she okay?’, you ask yourself as you swim past. But on closer inspection, you’re impressed with Poolside Pam’s preparation for her two-week sunlounger stint. Her setup has got it all: books, beer, chips, sunscreen, aftersun, and a startling array of fluorescent bikinis. Yes, this lady knows how to holiday. And Pam’s strong commitment to relaxation is admirable - you just hope she’s regularly topping up that sunscreen because she’s certainly talented when it comes to avoiding the shade.
You can spot Excursion Eddie a mile off. Needlessly expensive camera: Check. Walking boots: Check. Thick guidebook: Check. I imagine that’s what Eddie says to himself before leaving his cabin each morning - even if he’s only off down the pool, scuba gear in tow.
This adventurous bloke signs up to every trip going - despite the protestations of his kids, who just want one go on the waterslides. He always leads the pack on excursions, showing off all the stuff he’s learnt from his guidebook. If you like a good excursion too, then Eddie is interesting to chat to: he’s got the inside scoop on all the hottest ports. You’ll find him in the bar knocking back lemonades - he doesn’t want to be hungover for tomorrow’s trip.
Activities Amy is bezzie mates with all the animation crew and entertainment staff, and seems to have learned the activities timetable before she even boarded. Whether it’s sunrise aqua yoga in the pool, a pre-lunch cooking class, or lessons at the rock climbing wall, unlike Poolside Pam, endlessly enthusiastic Amy never seems to sit down - she’s too busy having the time of her life! She’ll also be the first person to stick her hand in the air when the staff need a volunteer, and as a result of this, everyone on the ship seems to know her.
Did you meet Activities Amy on your last cruise? Or perhaps you’ve suddenly realised you’re Buffet Barry? Let us know, and we’ll help you find your perfect cruise.